This maybe a bit personal I am writting here..but yeah… I think it’s not that personal though… So I wanted to write about it here…
I am not in the mood, am not that well enough and I even not sure what am I thinking about… My mind is messy…. All the “data” seems not in their own place… It’s anywhere in mind… Semua nya berserabut…
For the first time in my life, I felt like a shit… And for the first time in my life, I felt this… And for the first of everything, I found myself hard to decide on something…. and for the first time in mylife, I think every of the sequences on everything I will done… Usually, I will decide something without thinking the effects, but now, which makes me more harder to decide…
What the hell is happening to me? There are people chasing me out there… NON-STOP!!!! and that, I kept on running and running avoiding him… but then, nothing happened… It just not stopped at all… they keep on and still on chasing me… wanting me on this and that… even though I’ve told them I don’t want to be with them… or I don’t want to follow what they’ve said…. It annoys me so much…. When I reached home during my visits for holidays, my family will inform me, ths and that did called me…. everytime I reached home, as in no other news I should listen instead of the person….
Then, I can’t hardly out… even staying at home… Knwoing they will come looking for me at house… or knowing I might bump into them while outing… You know how it feels? Feel like a shit, when I have my own life, but I have to control my own life because of them…. It sucks when you want to go somewhere but the canceled just because of the worry-ness you will run into them… Damn!
What they actually want from me? They want me, to be with them again…. Engaging and when the time comes, getting married…. Silly right????? They’re forcing me… and putting pressure on me… It’s a big burden on me…. When I realized I’ll be alone, nothing else on mind… I will start to think how can I avoid him if so? Even though I am not living with my parents again, they still come to my house as in they still very confident I am still living with my parents… Crazy right????
I just don’t know…. Don’t know what to do…. Highlighting here….cause I know he will be reading this… I am going to Bintulu with Cyril, and I hope he will stop what ever he is doing… It’s not only troubling me, but also my family… enough is enough!!! When I said it’s over, I really meant it… we’re over and stop chasing me like I’m yours!!!! It’s been two years since the day I asked for the break up… so stop it!!!
9 Comments on "Thousands of Burden"
uih? your ex now is a stalker? Geee…this is bad.
It’s too bad actually… can’t stand of it… but yala… he never gives up… :(
are u okay gal????
so long hasnt been talking to u.
hope u are doin good there…
anything let me know k
I’m fine babe…. Yeah, we haven’t been chatting for a long time… you too… Inform me if anything… know my number right? :D
I hope things work out for you. *Sigh* your entry is too personal for me to comment.
Hahaha Thanks Sam… :)
report polis ajak!
enjoy your trip to Bintulu …
Dah report… but he never gives up… :(
Thanks Bro… :D
hmmm… remind me of this one crazy stalker i had back in high school. kept on calling my house phone and bila angkat he will either senyap or breath heavily. gila psycho. and he does that for 1.5 years. i nak angkat phone pun jadi phobia.
Haha atleast… dia call and senyap… but my case, he will keep on calling… and will cari me… if cun kena me, memang ada saja nak di rayu… yuks!
use stick to tukuk his palak
Hahahaha Lak ku suruh ko polah kat nya,,,, LOL
Ignore jak Amiey. It’s not worth mentioning about even. You have Cyril, lantaklah org ya. The more u worry about it, the happier he will be because he will succeed in bothering you.
I ignore them so much Sis, but they keep coming… Tak tahan… :(
I have seen stalker cases a lot. I can imagine how bad it is, and what you are going through. You may not like to hear this, but this can go on for years, and nothing much you can do to actually stop the harassment, until the day that he himself can finally accept the truth.
I know it’s not your fault, but try not to be harsh, carry a gracefulness and air of maturity when talking with him. Show that in a way you are better off without him, and proofing it with the way you speak to him (if so happen that u answered his calls). I know it’s easier said than done and not an overnight effect can be seen but.. Pray to God, and ask him to pray that he have the strength to accept things as it is, and try to pursue his own happiness.
If done correctly, he’ll on the other hand will be able to pray for your happiness too, which I can imagine is a very difficult thing to do on his side.
Just make sure you take good care of yourself and never never be alone with him, because someone who have this ‘disorder’ might loose their better judgment… that’s when the heart conquering and blinding the mind.
Thanks Sis for the advise…
I can say here, I’ve been good to him after the break up.. but he overly act towards me…
When he knows I am no more single, the more he tries to approach me… I’ve been so silent about him… but ya la… Ignored him so much, but he buat me macam ni…
I can be sabar with him anymore.. I think it’s enough for him to treat my life macam ni… I feel sick of him…
I wish he stop all of this.. I can’t stand it…
I think he should realized this… I am no more his.. and yeah.. i am taken somemore… he should just sacrifice the love if he wants me to be happy… but he is doing me more in trouble.. that’s how he loves me? urgh! :(
have you try voodoo?
..
just kidding..
Not good one Sis..lol